Wow! It is always a nice feeling before going home. Heart inside is always filled with excitement and thrill… I am going home again! Home coming.. Home sweet Home.. what not? It is 1:30 a.m currently.. My flight takes off at 5:30 a.m.. I will be leaving hostel at 3:00 a.m..
I am wondering what I am going to do at home. Somehow I feel as if I have lost my attachment with home. Earlier during my engineering days, I used to love being in the college with al my friends.. one month break used to be too big and i used to get pissed off at home. Now the scenario is similar but I somehow feel as if i do not belong to this IIFT hostel also.. I have not yet adjusted myself to the sorroundings.. Maybe friends make a person happy or sad.. I am yet to find someone here who will make me happy or sad. Maybe the search will not result in anything because B School students are smart, professional and practical. I somehow feel as if I am the one who is left out in that sense. I am yet to become a practical person.. I live in dreams made in the air.. I know that those dreams are not going to become realities.. I know I am not going to gain anything.. but i cannot convice myself..
Huh! I need to do some final packing.. Have planned out certain things for the holidays.. Let me see how I implement them.
well…i wont be able to come online again before the new year eve.. So Happy new year in advance..
I am 22 years old… On 8th Dec, celebrated my birthday IIFT style. I got bumps so hard that my ass is still paining… 😀 But yeah I must confess that I really enjoyed. My room mates arranged for cakes, chips and cold drinks. At exactly 12 o clock I was dragged out of my room by my enthusiastic mates who wanted to whip me badly. The location was as usual the Hostel Stairs. My roomies also had to share the burden of getting kicked on their asses. Anna, Modi, Sukhad, Anuj and Paji.. all got kicked. Anna as usual was the one to be hit badly. He is everyone’s darling as far as giving GPLs is concerned. I cut the cake and before it was even fully cut, I realised the whole cake was spilled all over my face and hair.
After the initial euphoria was over, I realised I had many things to do. I had an end term exam the next day. There was a presentation also and I had to stay awake till 4 in the morning to complete the task assigned to me by Paji! The whole day of my birthday went on reaplying to smses, attending calls and saying “Thanks :)” to all the scraps in orkut. Oh!!! I forgot one thing.. Many friends called me up and wished me.. I felt really happy because i realised the kid inside and i felt as if i am an important person.
Well! U might be thinkin what does the title of this blog mean? Well Let me tell you, a very close friend of mine gave me the bestest birthday gift ever. He gave me some valuable insights into many things in my life. We started chatting on google talk at around 1:00 A.M and it went on till 3:00 A.M. It was on the night next to my b’day. Due to reasons unknown to myself I have been living a life of a psychopath for quite sometime now. What I mean by this is that I am not being my usual self… who used to be bubbly and full of energy. Somehow I lost myself due to many things. I want to get out of this. This friend has always been a guide for me. he knows and understands me better than anyone else on this earth.
He made me realise that life is all about going ahead.. many have told.. many have made me understand.. but there was a difference in what he said. he just striked the chord… He made me understand that shredding “I” can be beneficial at times. he gave me two best ways out of this quagmire.. I found the second one to be more suitable for me. Although the path will be full of solitary kinda thing, atleast it will keep me busy for the time being. I will be able to do some help for those who are not as priviledged as we are. It is too early to say what I will be doing.. But i always thought about doing many things for others. Maybe I will be doing something now.. Atleast I have a reason to believe that I am not worthless… I can understand that I can be of help to atleast one or two people.
Gonna sleep nw.. i know the structure is a problem in this blog..
but let it be
akhir dil se nikli zubaan sachi hoti hai